Here it is, Day 3 and I just read over my journal entry, It has made me think, am I any different today than I was 2 years ago!? I’m happy to say that I can see the difference in me since then, however reading over this journal entry I still remember how it felt. I know I am a work in progress, thank God He doesn’t leave us where we’re at. So without further Delay here is day 3.
February 26, 2014
Well today was day 3 of no make up. It was a full day, our son Tyler broke his wrist and we spent most of our day at the hospital. I felt ok this morning leaving the house without make up on, I went to the ladies prayer group and was fine until I went to the washroom and was reminded that I was wearing no make up, immediately I felt ugly and a bit self conscious, my hair did not look as nice as I had hoped it would and I felt bad. When I was at the hospital I didn’t think too much about the fact that I wasn’t wearing any make up, until I went to the bathroom and caught a glimpse of my naked face. Again I felt ugly, I began to think about why I am doing this no make up “challenge” so I knew I needed to dig deeper than just being disgusted with the way I look without make up,( wow, that says a lot there, that word disgusted is how I felt) I really feel like there is nothing special about me, that I can get lost in the crowd, that I am invisible. That makes me feel insecure. Funny if you think about it though, how can make up make such a difference, how does it make me stand out or feel special? I don’t know and I’m not able to answer that just yet, but God is faithful, His word says if you seek me you will find me and he also said ask for wisdom and he will give it to you, no questions asked. I know I will come to know and understand what I need to find out of this whole “challenge” right now it’s enough to just know that I don’t think too much of myself and that’s not what God wants for me and frankly I don’t want it either, I’ve been feeling this way for far too long and I’m done! I don’t want to be a prisoner to anything, even if that anything is wearing make up.